38 yer olds are good kisserssss
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
