i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
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