If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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