I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
We got so high we made milksteak
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
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i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
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I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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