I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Randomize
