My nipple is on Facebook.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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