Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
