I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Randomize
