You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
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