I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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