I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
