he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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