Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
In America we eat man semen.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
