called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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