How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Alive.
So much puke
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
Randomize
