I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Sorry my hands just texted you
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
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