You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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