big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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