I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
