I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
