Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
porn star boner night. come get it.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
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