she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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