hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
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