So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize