Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
