drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
