You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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