do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Randomize
