Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize