Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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