Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
