So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
