she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
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