dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
