Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
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