Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
