I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
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My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
So squirting runs in the family.
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I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
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