I'm drive I can fine osifer
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
