need another drink. this is the easiest way
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
