He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
