I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Randomize