i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
We need to get me chipped asap
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Randomize
