8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
