can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize