Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
