I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
The best revenge is premature balding
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
