I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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