I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
