For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
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I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
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