...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
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