We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize